How to Contact Your Roommate {Guest Post by Alyssa}

Hello lovelies!

Quite a large portion of my readers graduated high school last month and are on your way off to college - Congratulations! You are about to embark on a journey that truly will help you find out who you are, through many trials, frustrations, and opportunities.

Now that we're getting towards the middle of summer, I know some of you are probably excited about college but also trying to forget about it for a little while and just have fun with your high school friends before everyone goes their separate ways.

One of your first friends in college may be your roommate (or in my case, my suitemate!), so when Alyssa contacted me with the idea for this post, I was thrilled to share this with y'all because I feel like most people think everything is as easy as in the movies (I know I thought that!).

As far as my not-so-extensive knowledge goes, some of you who will be attending State universities should be receiving your housing assignments soon and, unfortunately, some of you may have to wait until August! Either way, I hope you find Alyssa's tips really helpful!


How To Contact Your Roommate For The First Time
By: Alyssa J Freitas

Hello everyone! My name is Alyssa and I blog over at Alyssa J Freitas(I know, I was so original with the title) and I write about etiquette, college, and life. It is a pleasure to be with you today while Mikkaela is in Prague. I hope you find this post helpful and welcome you to visit my site for more!

“Wait, these are all of the questions?!?! How are they supposed to match me up with a roommate based on only 5 questions?” This was what I wondered before my freshman year of college as I was filling out the survey which would determine who I would live with for the next year. When you are going away to college it can be a nerve-wrecking experience not only because you are entering a completely new academic setting but also because you are being thrown into a totally strange social/living situation; how weird is it that we just pack up and move into such close quarters with someone we don’t even know? I’ll tell you, it’s wicked weird.

There are always both success and horror stories from freshman year roommates, which you often can’t control. What you can control however is the first contact you make with your roommate and the first impression you make. I’m going to share with you my own story and give you some tips on how to contact your roommate for the first time.

You’ll probably receive your roommate’s email and I would recommend exchanging phone numbers right away. It just makes communicating so much easier! Once you can text one another, that’s when the fun begins.

One of the first things my roommate and I started talking about was what books we like to read and the movies we enjoy watching; pretty safe and standard stuff. I’d say this is a good way to begin. She then asked me why she couldn’t find me on Facebook. Ok here we go.  So, I just recently got on Facebook (and only really to connect with other bloggers) which means that my roommate couldn’t Facebook stalk me. We sent pictures to each other to see what we looked like and my first mistake was to send one with my sunglasses on. I don’t know what I was thinking! She couldn’t even see my face (insert face palm emoji here).  

We moved on to going over logistics, like who would bring the microwave and fridge. Through talking we also discovered we had purchased the same comforter #matchmadeinheaven. And that was about it for our first conversation!

Now let’s go over the dos and don’ts of your first roommate conversation:

Do exchange general pleasantries and talk about basic, common interests.

Don’t make any snap judgments about your roommate. I really want to stress this! Whether you think you’ll be perfect together or already feel like you want a switch, absolutely reserve judgment until you’ve spent time together. It takes time to get to know people and you want to avoid going into your new living situation with your mind already made up.   

Do go over logistics. Find out who will bring the microwave, fridge, tv, etc.

Don’t ask potentially offensive or insensitive questions (visit my blog to get a list of great questions to ask in that first conversation).

The main thing to keep in mind is that you want to be truthful, authentic, and open-minded. You’d be surprised how well a few questions can serve to match you up with a great roommate! My roommate and I from freshman year are still very close (she’s one of my best friends) and we couldn’t have been happier together.

Best of luck with your new roommate! For some great questions to ask and conversation starters, visit my blog here.   


Catch you next time.

P.S. Want 10% off the cutest bows at Sugar Spice and Sparkle?! Use the code "SWPREP" at checkout!


  1. This is great! My daughter was an RA at her college. One of the biggest things to get through on move in day was meeting the roommate if students hadn't been in touch over the summer.


  2. Great idea for those first leaving home or going to university, I imagine it would be quite daunting living with a stranger! So these are great ideas :)

  3. Love this, and super helpful list of example questions! I might be in a dorm soon and it is definitely daunting!

    xx | Steph @ The Lovely Essentials & Jenssen's Designs

  4. I had the worst roommate experiences and mostly because the other girl was rude, never there, and downright gross. I so wish I would've roomed with someone that I knew!

  5. Such a great post! These pointers can definitely help to mitigate some of the more awkward roommate situations right off the bat. My first roommate experience was pretty awful, but then I was moved to a single bedroom dorm haha. Wish I had these when I started college!

    Alessandra | blog.pumpup.com

  6. Great tips!! I didn't have the best experience with my freshman year roommate, I ended up moving out.
    xo, claudia

  7. This is such a great post! Picking your roommate is usually better than having your roommate picked for you!


  8. Great tips!
    I had 3 roommates in an apartment style dorm my first year and while 2 of them were amazing there was one girl who decided that it would be fun to vacuum at 3 am every night. I'm so glad we were on different sides of the room.

    xoxo, Jenny || Breakfast at Lillys

  9. Such a a great idea! My boyfriend and I have both had to do this multiple times because of internships. It really is an art! xoxo

  10. I had such a great experience with my roommate my freshman year, she and I are still super close 4 years later. I am so happy I chose to be assigned to a random roommate based off of 5 silly questions! (:

  11. These are such great tips! I had the best roommate experience freshman year, and I'm now entering my second year of being a freshman RA, so these are so so so true!

  12. I wish I had these tips when I first started college! I rushed into rooming with someone who I thought I would be totally compatible with, and living with her really put a damper on my whole freshman year.

    Pick Your Beau

  13. This is such a great post! I really could have used this my junior year when I had random roommate!

    XX, SS || A Little Seersucker Sass

  14. These are such great tips! I met my roommate through our class Facebook group and didn't meet until the day we both moved in. She ended up quickly becoming one of my closest friends, and even though I transferred, we are still close!


  15. Wonderful post!! I ended up having two roommates this past year (one first semester who then left to study abroad, and then a random roomie second semester). Both are great girls but I'm not sure that I meshed the best for living with either of them, so it was a tough year. I am definitely looking forward to my single room for senior year!!

    xoxo A

  16. These are great. I'm heading over to your site now!

  17. This is great! I had a really good friend who had a horrible roommate and it can really make that year difficult. Great tips!
    Lauren Ashley

  18. Ahhhhh this is giving me flashbacks to the summer before freshman year! All of these tips are so true, and I definitely made a snap judgement. I saw my to-be roomie's profile picture and thought she looked super intense, but she's one of the quietest, nicest people I know! Not a horrible assumption, but it definitely was incorrect!

  19. Such an exciting time in life! Wish I had a guide when I was going through this :]

    xo katie // a touch of teal

  20. Great tips! Moving away to college is such a thrilling time in life! I remember contacting my freshman roommate for the first time. We were total opposites but quickly became best friends.

  21. This is a great article! Something that I would never have thought of if I was about to embark to college, I will share with some of my students....thanks for sharing.

  22. Such a helpful post! I started my freshman year Summer 2013 and used an online service to find my roommate. We became great friends and even now are branching off to rent an apartment with one of our friends. It's definitely important to reach out to prospective roommates and definitely not make any judgments based on looks, post, etc.


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